John's Reassessment of his Thoughts

THE SITUATION

1. I have been looking after my elderly mother

2. Although she has a degenerative neurological disease and has been confined to a wheelchair for some time she has been able to have a relatively normal life because of my care for her at the family home

3. However, her situation has been deteriorating and she has been experiencing increasingly frequent bouts of mild to extreme disorientation, including anxiety, hysteria, amnesia and fainting

4. My mother, when lucid, says she wishes to remain at home, but because of my work and school responsibilities, as well as social activities, I cannot be with her all the time

5. There is no one else available to look after my mother and I do not have enough money to pay for someone to look after her when I am not there - perhaps there is no-one else available to look after her and perhaps there is no money available to pay for someone else but perhaps there is

6. Recently, she was found by me, after I returned from an outing, at the bottom of stairs, with the wheelchair on her, unconscious and bleeding. She was taken to hospital and found to have no serious injuries

7. Extensive tests were carried out on her, and the unanimous opinion of the family doctor, the attending physician and the social worker was that she should be kept in hospital until a permanent chronic care place became available in three or fourth months time

8. I know that my mother will stridently oppose being in a chronic care unit. I realise that this is inevitable, but I am fearful that being institutionalized in the hospital, waiting for the place, will lead to her psychological deterioration as her faculties became idle, and that she will become depressed knowing she will soon be committed to the chronic care unit. Perhaps my mother will stridently oppose being in a chronic care unit and perhaps staying in the hospital will lead to depression but perhaps it won't

9. I suspect that the institutional authorities' recommendations, while simplifying matters for them, are not really in the best overall interests of his mother, as they underestimate my ability to look after my mother, and they are not heeding my concerns about her psychological deterioration. I need to consider if what the Drs is saying is true and perhaps get a second opinion. I need to consider the best way of preserving my mother's psychological welfare - staying in an institution might not be 'institutionalisation'.

10. I am gradually realising that she has little time left, and we have little time left, and I am really looking forward to at least spending
a "last summer" together. I am now less sure that the best way to spend what time we have left together is by having my mother stay at home - would it really be a "last summer"?

PROGRESS
A PROCEDURE TO HELP YOU MAKE WISE DECISIONS

Home Intro Theory Model Cases Training Publications Endorsements Links

Home -> Model Cases -> Situation And Problem -> Reassess Initial Thoughts -> John's Reassesses Thoughts