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A PROCEDURE TO HELP YOU MAKE WISE DECISIONS

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John: What Progress Have I Made

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John records the Progress he has made:

PROGRESS

 

Before

Now

Situation

 

believed my mother would stridently oppose 'institutionalisation'

suspicious of Drs recommendations

willing to explore what mother really wants

understand Drs' worries and am investigating and monitoring mother's medical situation

Decision

 

saw the choices as between 'institutionalisation' and a 'last summer'

no longer stuck between two options which both seem to have tremendous downsides to them

Values

 

good medical care for mother

mother living at home as wishes

preventing depression

preventing faculties becoming idle

good medical care for mother

protecting mother's emotional health

my life not being severally and negatively affected

mother getting what she wants

preventing mother's faculties becoming idle

Options

 

'institutionalisation'

'last summer'

staying in hospital

bringing mother home

mixture of hospital care and home

letting mother choose

Mixture of hospital care and living at home captures the following weighty values:

1. good medical care for mother (although probably not quite as good as hospital only)

2. protecting emotional health

3. my life not being severally and negatively affected

4. mother getting what she wants (as she gets some control over when at home and when in hospital)

5. preventing faculties becoming idle


John reviews his table of emotions from stage 1 and realises that what he felt about the problem has changed in many ways . Emotions such as guilt and anxiety have reduced and he feels more pride and hope. (normal text is john's initial emotions, bold emotions at end of stage 1, italic current emotions)

EMOTIONS
EMOTION STRENGTH ( 0 -100) ABOUT WHAT APPROPRIATE
yes,partly,
no, ? 		APPROPRIATE ACTION
Anxiety/ Worry/
Despair
98-70-20
Letting mother down by doing the wrong thing
 yes
the hospital and home mixture is not letting my mother down
Anxiety
95- 60-40
Possibility of mother being depressed
yes
the hospital and home mixture should go some way to limiting mother's potential depression
Guilt
95-70-20
Abandoning/ failing to care for mother
partly (depending what else do)
I will be caring for my mother by adopting the hospital and home option
Fear
90-20
Of not being able to cope
partly
The hospital and home option means that I am more likely to be able to cope - I will monitor to see how I get on
Hope
90-70-95
that can spend some time together
partly
monitor carefully how the hospital and home option works out
Concern
85-20
For mother's wish to remain out of hospital,
 partly
(mother's wishes rated as weighty but not the most important consideration as doubts over mother's ability to choose wisely for herself given her psychological condition - lack of lucidity, and the need to protect my own interests)
the hospital and home mixture allows mother to have some control over where she lives
Anxiety
80- 90-35
 Danger of medical mishap if out of hospital yes
the hospital and home mixture should go some way to limiting danger of medical mishap
Pride/ Self Respect 
80-70
Over looking after mother at home
 partly(certainly was very kind but depends also upon the wisdom of looking after the mother at home)
seek to make a wise decision that can take pride in
Anger 
75-50
At the implication by the medical authorities that he was unable to look after his mother
 partly
carefully reconsider how able you are to look after mother at home
Guilt
70- 50
Fall Down the Stairs
 partly but did believe was doing the right thing
none but try to work out how to avoid similar mishaps in future
Sadness  
70
Medical condition of the mother
 yes
none: the medical condition is a sad fact of life
Suspicion 
70-50
At medical authorities recommendations
 ?
seek independent medical advice, carefully consider what Drs say, monitor carefully how the hospital and home option works out
Discomfort 
40-20
Upsetting mother, and her angry response if leave her in hospital
 partly(might not have this response; but the discomfort at this response points to the importance of letting people do what they choose)
the hospital and home mixture allows my mother to have some control over her life
Pride/ Self Respect 
95
Own Decision-Making
yes
I have thought and felt carefully about what to do

PROGRESS
A PROCEDURE TO HELP YOU MAKE WISE DECISIONS

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